Cooking to Beat the Troubling Toddler

We started our day with some playtime in his room before we baked.

We made granola cookies.
Sebastian had so much fun dumping and scooping ingredients…

The batter looked so good, smelled so good and tasted soo good…

And then….

Something went terribly wrong. They were ackward and burnt. We just take off the burnt outside and eat the middle. They are probably no where near as yummy as they were meant to be but we like them just the same. And S, well he is so proud of his cookies.

What’s your favorite granola treat?

I made my first soup from the new soup book. I loved it…Papa and Sebastian seemed less enthusiastic about it.

Kitchen picnics and storytime quilts

Yesterday I started working on Ethan’s baby quilt. Instead of the boy n girl appliqué I am going to use things in nature to sew onto the green and orange blocks.

Today when Sebastian woke up from his nap he told me a story about a bear, a mouse and a monster before he told me to get out so that he could play with said bear,mouse, and monster.

We then slid down the stairs…

And had a fruit picnic in the kitchen..

Crying Sun

The other day it was actually sunny here! Can you believe it?! Sebastian and I hung out on my bed, opened all of the curtains(papa and I sleep in s sun room), and took pictures..here are the ones from my phone…

So invigorating, so refreshing!

We also went outside and Sebastian played with neighbor while Papa went to buy his plasma tv.

Yesterday was tough. S was in rare form!! Very early in the morning I took the boys to walmart to get fabric and he was so awful!! I did manage to get some fat quarters for Ethan’s quilt but not for the birdy hanger because no one was around to cut that fabric and the way S was acting I didn’t have time to find someone.

I then went to my moms waiting for my aunt to get home so she could go grocery shopping with me. But Ethan cried for most of the day. The night before he was uncomfortable as well. It seems it’s getting worse and we still can’t get a hold if Medicaid! How ridiculous is healthcare? My son needs this medication to ease his pain and discomfort and he can’t get it because no one can give us a straight answer!

I Now Realize…

Sebastian is at his sleepover and me…well I just got finished taking a bath. A much desired bath I might add!

I bought Burts Bees bath salts, I made a body scrub out of olive oil and salt, made a honey mask, lit two candles and filled the tub. Perfect.

Well almost. It would have been perfect if the water was warm and not draining and if I didn’t hear the baby crying downstairs.

BUT…

I enjoyed it and loved it all the same (might take a warm one tomorrow).

Physically, I grooved to my music, became one with the water..I forgot how much I liked playing with my hands in the water. I BREATHED!

Spiritually, I starred into the flickering candle. I looked at my faith and at me. Lately my faith has been flickering just like that candle. It’s not my beliefs but myself. I haven’t been true to ME. Aside from being a mom, I have been someone that I am not. Not intentionally, and it’s not a bad thing but I tried to be who I wasn’t.

So, recently I have been turning to God ( in a way) and inward. Seeking myself. And I am finding her. That part of me that I always turned to when I was low or depressed or in Spring. The only difference now is that I have faith and MUCH more experience under my belt.

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Before I left S with his aunt we went to the bookstore where I got that book on trees – I REALLY love trees – that I saw last week.

Here is a smile or two for you…

Week OH Slow Week

We have a busy yet unproductive week here. In fact we are going a little stir crazy. Craving Spring in all it’s GLORY. It’s been cold and the snow… :::sigh:::

Here is a small look at our week:

Sebastian picked this frame out to paint for Papa’s birthday…he worked so hard on it.

We stirred the brownies with love and kisses.

This pillow fight…was SO much fun!

Ethan got dressed up to go to Papa’s birthday dinner…and discovered the singing and moving giraffe. (He is more alert this week)

Boots were left in the middle of the walkway.

The fish bowl was cleaned and robots were drawn.

Smiles were given and hats were found.

Yesterday I took his slide out of the closet and found this article in my aunt’s magazine…making me want more veggies and whole foods…AND I really like the picture isn’t it cute?

So Sebastian leaves today for his biweekly sleepover. Me, well I get to have some Meghan time ( only partly mommy time since Ethan will still be at home but he sleeps all of the time still).

Dreams

Dreams:

What are they made of…
aside from the ink on my back

Whistles adorned with fears?

Hope n tears hanging
high atop the old Redwood?

Skipping and tripping
Wishing we could

But learning that we should…

Reach, jump,
N fly the kite
that is life

Erasing that lump
Skip through this meadow

Hold it all in your hands
Go ahead
Let it spill over.

Dreams:
More than the ink on my back.

Love

I can only dream,
dream of the day
when you are here
with us.

I can only dream
of pancake breakfasts,
heart shaped goodness
and laughter mixed
with orange juice.

I can only dream
of music filling the air
as our feet paint
the wooden floor.

I can only dream
of daytrips
here or there
Or driving
to find adventures of our own.

I can only dream
of picnics
under great oak trees
with kites, watermelon,
and races to and fro.

I can only dream
of roasting marshmellows
games and telling stories
late into the night.

I can only dream
of tucking them in
fireflies in jars
lighting our way.

I can only dream
of goodnight kisses
as you cuddle
and hold me tight.

I can only dream,
dream of happiness
when you will
finally be with us.

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Happy Valentines Day

Famous Love Letters:James Joyce:

You are my only love.

You have me completely in your power.

I know and feel that if I am to write anything fine and noble in the future I shall do so only by listening at the doors of your heart.

I would like to go through life side by side with you, telling you more and more until we grew to be one being together until the hour should come for us to die.

Officer Sebastian

Today was a busy day. When we got home from the mall, Sebastian was cranky and thankfully fell asleep on the couch.
Ethan and I went upstairs and hung out with Papa.

We were invited to a birthday party at the neighbors. The theme was police.

The surprise?

Two officers came to the party! Sebastian didn’t understand who they were until all of the kids were invited outside to look at the police cars.

Sebastian was the first in and he LOVED it. He was allowed to turn on the lights, sound the sirens and he was a police car hog!

He loves it when we pass police cars so you can imagine his excitement!

All of the kids returned back inside to their pizza and games but Sebastian? Nope, he kept going car to car. Until we finally had to carry him inside so that the police officers could leave.

I loved seeing hid face, his curiosity. It was beautiful.

Through My Child’s Eyes

Wow!
Mom!
Look!

A LADYbug!

Wow!
Mom!
Look!

A grassHoPper!

Wow!
Mom!
Look!

An airPLANE!

I let Sebastian use one of my cameras today.  Here are some of his photos through his eyes…

He did an amazing job.  And it is so interesting to see what our children see.

We should all try to stop, breathe, and look from where our children are seeing the world – visibly, mentally, etc.

But,…but,…

These are Sebastian and Papa’s snowman and igloo from last night…cool huh?

Today was S’s 2 1/2 month checkup and Ethan’s 2 month. E has GERD just like S did. So Dr. Kitchen ( as S calls her) prescribed Pepcid.

I waited for what felt like forever at the pharmacy. The pharmist(who has been my pharmist all my life told me that E is not covered on my Medicaid and gave me a number to call. I couldn’t even afford what it cost out of pocket. So it went down something like this:

“Meghan, this costs $200 without insurance”. He walks to the side placing the medicine my baby needs on a shelf. Not even giving me the option to pay for it.

I nod, tears swelling my eyes.

“but he needs it”

Blinking and looking at him I slowly and fadingly keep repeating: “But he needs it”

I’m not sure if it was pity, compassion, understanding or just a tough luck kid look on his face but I walked out of there feeling defeated and helpless.

I walked into my Grandmother’s house where I had left both boys and broke down in tears. I wasn’t able to give my son something that would help him and to top it off I fell to my knees confessing that I had no more windshield washer fluid and couldn’t see out the window. (Funny but true)

Sebastian came over to me. Not understanding any of my babbling on about insurance and such but he understood my tears, my sadness, my helplessness and he scooped me up in a big hug…I felt so much better!

After a few more errands we went to the bookstore where I found a great sewing book which gave me a ton of ideas and this fabulous find, bargained at $3.99!

And I saw this book which I must read SOON:

Sebastian was excited that my aunt bought him the matching rainboots to his raincoat:

I came downstairs after putting S to bed to find Papa playing with E in the swing. E was smiling and laughing watching Papa make the fish jump. I love watching him play with the boys. It’s so heartwarming. So beautiful!

How sweet is his smile?